I had something to tell you on 2004-05-19 @ 4:21 p.m.
occurance reports
there are certain things that happen in my everyday life that make me fantasize about dropping everything and becoming a buddhist monk. here's what made that list so far today:
Occurance #1: i recently washed some clothes (that were light in color) with a maroon sheet. you can imagine what happened. today, i tried for the fifth time to get the dye out...not working. not only have i ruined two $65 pairs of khakis of my own, but my gorgeous manly-man boyfriend is now the proud owner of 2 pairs of slightly pink boxers and a pair of shorts that, in the right light, have a nice pinkish glow. he's none too happy.
Occurance #2: in an attempt to make my mom smile and say to herself "wow, what a great daughter i have" i volunteered to drive 25 minutes on wednesday mornings to clean the house. immediately after saying that i began to regret it until she started gushing about how she was so lucky to have me...damnit.
Occurance #3: concerning finances, it has now come down to a choice between either eating so that i can live to go to work or buying gas so that i can drive to work to make money to pay for the gas. when does it end?
Occurance #4: on my way to work, i had to get something to drink in order to take my birth control (as i see it, i can spend $1.09 out of my Gas-Only-Fund money to get outta spending untold amounts of money on a child that will probably grow up to hate me anyway). this particular gas station has only two sizes of fountain drink cups. super-tiny-midget-small and super-huge-too-big-to-ever-fit-in-a-cupholder-large. i had to struggle with this huge ass cup the entire ride. minor annoyance, yes, but if i were a monk i woudnt have had it.
Occurance #5: so i get to work. i prepare myself to be the phone bitch for the next seven hours when alllllll of a sudden something happens that makes me remember that i have a certain level of power that needs to be exercised sometimes. here's what went down. a certain employee (a nurse no doubt. i swear, for as long as i have lived i have never met a nurse that i liked. pretentious little things to only have a two year degree, huh?) comes off of the elevators. i am very busy with answering stupid questions and advising people where to go when i hear her tell another nurse that she's "about to go have some lab work done". she is walking towards the lab but because she is a nurse, i assume all is well. and besides, there's no WAY that she would just waltz into admissions as she passes the super-full waiting room...right? WRONG-O captain!! i soon find out (from a very very angry little old man) that "some ole gurl in them outfits them nurses were just went in thur! we done had been here befo hur" sure as shit i found out she jumped in front of everybody...THEN i find out that the person with the longest wait just happens to be the son of the (drumroll and trumpets)chairman of the board. now mind you, i dont give a fuck but the director of nursing certainly does as she comes to me freaking out. i calmly tell her that i'm working on it. then once i am positively sure that this rather large and rude nurse actually committed such a heinous admissions error i decided that i was going to jump her ass about it. so i paged her overhead as to alert the entire hospital that i, your friendly neighborhood operator, had a bone to pick with her. so she calls me back. i'll transcribe the conversation here:
me:"hey, did you just come down to have some lab work done?"
behemoth her: "yeah..."
me:"okay, well just in case you forgot, you've got to sign in with me first before going into a clerk's office because there are patients waiting in front of you and some of them have been here for thirty minutes or more."
mammoth her: "well i don't think that i should have to sign in and wait."
me: "...ok, well....ya do. just because you are an employee doesn't mean that you get to skip everybody else. do you see what i'm saying?"
gigantasaurus her: "yeah i see what you're saying but i think it's stupid."
me: "i'm glad that i have your opinion on the matter, however it doesn't matter because this is how it works...mmmmkay?"
husky her: "yeah....whatever"
she then proceeds to hang up on me...interesting. whatta mega-bitch. that's okay because she has to go through me to have anybody paged MUAHAHAHAHA!! and even better, i'm the one that she goes thru to get connected to her boyfriend's (that her husband is not aware of)long-distance phone number. not anymore sweetie-peetie!!
Occurance #6: i just realized that i am not but could be at home with ddot and the kids. i love him. so much that it's stupid really. he's the bomb. we're both off friday though so that makes me super happy. i wanna marry him.
Look Back][ Go Forth
Before I said that, I said this...
jumping off the proverbial bridge - 2005-03-12
"Karma or Fate's little Joke?" - 2005-01-11
Super-Sucks - 2005-01-03
"The Bike" - 2004-12-20
"Missed you" - 2004-12-08
